Father’s Day

   Pouring through the advertisements, I am amazed at how difficult this has become. Firstly my husband buys whatever he wants or needs for himself- well except for those things beyond our means. I look through to find an ad for suits. Buy one ,get one. I picture Kenny driving his truck in a suit with a spare draped over the passenger seat, just in case. Or maybe walking the greyhounds down Main St in Shickshinny in one. Yeah that’s not in the running at all.

There’s an ad for a Smart TV. What on earth? A smart tv…does it know what we want on without us using the remote, or maybe turns down the commercials automatically. No that would be a clairvoyant tv. Does it realize when my fingers land on three buttons that I only wanted one of them pressed? Maybe it pauses the program if I leave the room. No we have enough tvs, even if they are stupid tvs.

   There’s the nice looking watch that he can use the compass, know the altitude, temperature, longitude and latitude and what ever else is on the face of it…but that seems more like a retirement gift. Ah but the nest is now empty. Does that mean we have a contender?  Of course he uses his cell phone if he wants the time. But what if its batter was drained? Aha! Maybe this would be the symbolic retirement gift of the empty nest having survived those years. (Parenting teenagers is not for the faint of heart and being the step father of teenagers is an uphill road (especially if one of the teens is as stubborn as he is). AH well, a watch for a job complete now- but is it ever fully done?

   Well, the tie , the fragrances, ah the game of golf paid for…all done along the way, now have less relevance.  SO what does he do in his off time? He focuses on the dogs and putters around the house. (Mind you by putter I mean rips out walls, adds on rooms, makes furniture, remodels kitchen, bathrooms and such.) SO I could look into a gift card at Lowe’s or the hardware store a few blocks from here- pricier but convenient. I have to wonder if that would fall under something he’d enjoy.

   I could get him the beer of the month deal…but I did that before. Forget cakes and such- he’s not one for sweets. A couple nights’ stay at the shore or something to do with the casino a half hour away. He’s never been to that casino…and do I want to open that can of worms? A couple of days at the shore- he’d be worrying about the dogs the whole time no matter who dog sat.

Maybe there’s some type of game I could get tickets to or concert…but we’ve talked about how at our age we’d rather be in our home and watch it on tv- no traffic, less expense.

Pilot lessons? No time for it. Good grief. Grass seed for the back yard? We need more dirt first. Aha a landscaper to do the backyard. The tons of sand we put there a couple of years ago now is looking pathetic, barren…wasteland comes to mind. The patches of grass reminds us how nice it was with grass. Of course I wonder if we might get plagued with fleas given we have not had that problem often at all since the sand is here.

   He buys himself plenty of clothes. I will have to give this more thought.  He has plenty of tools, except electric trimmers or a power saw. Hmm. Well he really liked the hatchet I bought him for Christmas the first year we lived here. ..not…he laughed uncontrollably. I felt it was practical with 11 acres. He didn’t see it that way- but admitted it was a gift no one ever bought for him.

  This may be why Mother’s Day is a bigger time for retails profits than Father’s Day. Where do we go from here? I’d bring him enough- of what he needs in life, enough of what he wants It seems in his mind he’s already there and I can see why that is. More thought. Now what to get for my former mother-in-law’s 90th birthday? Yes let it begin….


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